My Grace Filled Life

As a child I was told the Catholic Church was an outdated greedy institution. I never thought about being Catholic, in fact, I didn’t think about church at all. I had a broken home where my dad began to sell drugs which eventually landed him in jail. My mother was busy with being a waitress so there was no parental guidance. My older brother really didn’t like me and there simply was not a relationship with my older sister. I was truly at a lost with anything in life, it simply did not make sense. In high school I grew tired of being the typical jock and by second semester of senior year I knew I didn’t want to accept any scholarship offers to play football in community college. All of my friends went that route but I felt something different. It was June 6, 1999 and I came to be baptized in a protestant church. I found a peace I had never known, but it was short lived. After falling away into drugs and alcohol I ended up married. This went really bad as I was far away from God once again. As you might expect within a couple of months of being married we were not speaking to one another. I was tired of drinking and the night life. I turned to God once again at a protestant church. This only divided me all the more and one night during an argument she told me to choose between God or her. I yelled “I CHOOSE GOD!” I left the house the next day and we divorced. About a year later I met a lady (my current wife) and we bonded immediately. She was the first Catholic that could answer questions about the Church. She invited me to Mass while in perfect charity she would attend my church with me. It was shortly after this that through my girlfriend God gave me a spiritual slap in the face and I realized for the first time in my life the beauty of Holy mother Church. We were married in Dec. of 2007 and I was received into the Church during the Easter Vigil of 2008. I just started a men’s group at my parish where I meet with men every week to discuss the issues and challenges we face as men. I’m a Eucharistic minister, I have a holy hour before the Blessed Sacrament, I’m a EWTN media missionary, I am a member of the Rosary confraternity, I’m a 3rd degree Knight of Columbus member, and I am working on a Theology degree so I can teach religion in a school. I am a father to two beautiful daughters and we are anticipating the arrival of our 3rd child any day now. I am so appreciative of being a New Creation in Christ!

About two months ago I was praying to the Virgin Mary that I wanted to go to church every single day but that I get to skip one day a week, and I was asking Jesus if he would be my teacher and teach me and not only teach me about his love but also teach me how to speak Spanish. I knew that the church next to my house has a mass every single morning, and I also knew that on Mon,Tues,and Wed they have a mass in the afternoon. For the first couple of weeks I went to the afternoon masses and the morning masses. Then I said oh God why couldn’t these masses be on the afternoon.
A couple of weeks later I went to my orientation at my university and I got my class schedule and I wasn’t happy with it was because I had class every day and most of the days were in the morning and I wanted to work in the morning.
Two weeks after, that same church changed their mass schedule to a mass each day except for Monday and the masses from Tues-Friday were in Spanish. All of these masses were in the afternoon. Today while I was in church I realized that Jesus set up my time to fit the time of Church.
He put my classes and my work in the morning so I would have time to go to the afternoon masses, he also added more afternoon masses and allowed me to go six out of seven days a week. Not only that but he also put four masses a week in Spanish so that I would learn.

JESUS IS AWESOME

I may not know how to pray
But I know you hear everything that I say.
My conversations with you are long and nice
After all you are my Christ.
When we last spoke you showed me the world through your eyes
A world of heaven and paradise.
At that sight I wished it could be mine
But to do so your word must become my spine.
Every day I worked hard on getting there
But the devil fooled me with his stare.
When I looked at him he told me to approach
He said he would train me and be my coach.
As I took the first step darkness started to take over
It was hard to breath; I wanted it all to be over.
I don’t understand how you broke the spell
But once again you saved me from Hell.
The moment you called my name I found the missing particle of air
Not only for my lungs, but for heaven for which I need to prepare.
Every day I talk to you asking if I am worthy to stay by your side
Telling you about my life and that I no longer wanted to hide.
Every day I go through trials knowing that you are standing by
And that I am safe no matter what the devil will try.

-Priest: kids, will you be ready to leave everything at this second, die and go with Jesus NOW?
- Kid: yes but I will be a little scared.
-Priest: scared of what?
-kid: of the unkown…
-Priest: I thought you trust in Jesus
-Kid: I do, but I m scared of the unknown.
- Priest: well this is lack of trust
- Kid: well then teach me how to trust…
Priest: repeat after me:
Jesus , please teach me how to trust in you. Same way you helped Peter up when he drowned walking on water, Help me up when I fall in temptation. Help me up when I do not realize that I am falling, but yet you forecast my injury. Let every injury be a lesson of how to trust in you more and more. Teach me how to trust in you…

I just wanted to share with you my experience at World Youth Day in Madrid Spain this year. I was raised Catholic, but like most people, I never understood my faith. We went to Mass most Sundays, and of course on Easter and Christmas but faith never had any meaning to me outside of the obligatory church attendance. In my early 20s, my friend got me involved with the young adult group in our parish. They were preparing to travel to Spain for World Youth Day. I had never heard about the event before, but it was an affordable way to go to Spain for two weeks, so I jumped right in! From the start, this was all it was for me. A trip to Spain. When we arrived, the first thing we did was attend the opening Mass in Cibeles Square. After that it was as if the flood gates of grace opened up. It was non-stop after that, we meet up with people from all over the world, people my age who were excited to be in Spain because of their faith. The discussions that we had were amazing and for the first time, I am beginning to grasp the beauty and excitement of our faith that everyone here seems to have. I know I still have a lot to learn, but now I know there is so much more to our faith than just showing up for Church twice a year! Thank God for this wonderful event and for all the people who work so hard on it!

Once upon a time tears ran down my face
Like rivers they fell, as if in a race
Then you came by and said with your charm and grace
“Now, now my dear there is nothing you can’t face”
You held me in your arms with a great embrace
Said there is nothing to fear you’ll get me through the maze.
I felt your motherly love running through my veins
My tears stopped at a marvelous haste.
We sat together talking by the fireplace
You said for the heavenly father I must leave a space
Embroider him in your heart where no one can erase
His great love from your life or even try to efface.
Remember him every day and give him praise;
For he is the only one that can get you out of your saddened phase.
Once you get to know him you will never want to replace
He saved you yet gave you the freedom for your voice to raise
You explained the son’s powerful love and his shining rays.
My dear mother I thank you for your solace
Not only for this but for helping me in so many ways
For reviving what was labeled as a helpless case.

The room is empty
The walls are blank
The feeling is ugly
Only two ways to escape this tank.
In the middle I stood
With both doors at sight
I wondered what could be beneath the hood
Where will I go on this next flight.
Through the first door I heard a seductive sound
One that says “don’t ask how
There are much to be found
Go on and enter now”.
So I turned to the other door
It seemed peaceful
There was a massive light reflecting on the floor
That seemed joyful.
Within a moment of loss I was seduced
To a useless place
Where I would be amused
But the amusements where only a phase.
With every step there was a sign
That warned me of the downfall
Told me salvation would be mine
Yet I ignored it all.
I was blinded by the presentation of this world
But a great force opened my mind
And I was able to see the word
Which gave me the truth to find.
I followed the signs which led me back to the start
In front of the doors once more
In my hands I placed my heart
But this time ready to soar.
As a stood there I noticed a change
It seemed when I slammed the door shut
A piece fell that changed my perspective’s range
Changed the size of the castle to a hut.
The pieces that were on the doors fell
To reveal two important words
One that said heaven and one that said hell
Words that define the difference between the two worlds.
When I opened heaven’s door I saw more than illumination
I saw the infinite joy
In the most glorious nation
A city far more powerful than Troy.
A place where there is no animosity
Only love and peace can exist
God’s greatest city
A place where no man can resist .
At the sight I fell to my knees
Asking god for his forgiveness
“I know I don’t deserve it but please
Rid my heart from all the possessiveness”.
Then I heard
a voice that said this is your home
When you riley on me you are always welcome
No matter how far you go or where you roam
You can always join me for supper when you come.

At my parish there is a woman who is very committed to this prayer movement for marriage and family life. The movement started in Ireland where a priest was so sad about the fact that there are so many divorces in our countries. What he started was a movement where a group of 24 people take responsibility to pray one hour each month. Thus with 31 groups there is continuous prayer on the planet for couples and families.

Now this woman at my parish asked me to get involved and at first I was daunted by the request to pray a whole hour! I was not used to it. But I took on the challenge.

My first prayer session I planned on focusing on my own family and my parents. The result was amazing. My fiance whom I was to marry shortly said there was something in the past that he had done that he was very ashamed of. He had never told anyone about it, not even his parents. Well shortly after my prayers, a few days after, he chose to tell me without me pushing him in to it. This made me feel so happy about being able to enter into our marriage with total honesty and trust.

Another wonderful event was regarding my father. During his life he found it very difficult to forgive people. When I was a teenager I asked him to leave my room because I was annoyed with him. His reply was: “Fine, but I will never step into your room again.” He was very hurt and mentioned this several times during the years to come.

Well the day after my prayer session, he called me and said that he would come the 3 hour drive and take a look at my flat. This was very rare for my father to suggest, for he never took initiatives like that. We had a nice time and when he left in the evening he said: “This is how I want to show you that I forgive you for what happened when you were a teenager. Today I have come into your room”.

Not long after he died suddenly. He had a heart attack. The reason I could feel peace about it was because there were no issues left between us.

I am so thankful to the Lord for his many blessings in my life. Praise be to the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit!

Grandma Leoline (Curtis) Doyle needs prayers. Youngest of the Helena and Joseph Curtis family, wife to Raymond A. Doyle mother to 12 children, all living, grandmother to 50 grandchildren and countless great grandchildren. She always taught all of us, children, grandchildren, greatgrandchildren and even neighbor kids to pray always and in everything to praise God for his goodness and petition for what we needed. Now this great prayer warrior is in need of all our prayers and love. She has a shoulder/arm injury which has put her in devastating pain. (I have had this type of injury and can only tell you that it made me realize how much more than we know or can comprehend that Jesus suffered on that cross) She cannot lie down and though that was difficult for me at 53 I cannot imagine how hard it must be for her at 93. Please storm heaven (as mom would say)with me and beg our merciful Lord Jesus for healing for this wonderful woman of faith. Lord Jesus heal Leoline, Thank you for the gift of her life and let her shoulder and arm heal so she can continue to lead our family and community in her example of following your teaching of praying always. In Jesus Name we pray. Mary mother of us all, given to us by your Son from the cross, interecede for Leoline your devoted daughter at the throne of your Son. Ask him to heal her and relieve her pain. He cannot refuse your request. She has always turned to you in time of need and asked your help for countless people she encountered who need help and prayers. Be there now for her as you were for your son. Ask your Son for healing for all who are in need today. Thanks to all who pray with me. God bless and keep you safe and strong in his love.

I came to you and you showed me happiness
As you drew me closer I saw your holiness,
But the fear in me took over
I was afraid of letting go and getting sober.
I feared your greatness because I was weak
So I drifted and stopped waiting for you to speak,
Little did I know that loneliness would settle about
Even the beauty of the flowers I started to doubt.
Then I realized that one cannot live without water
As I gasped for air the weather became hotter,
That’s when I came back begging for your grace
Thanking you every moment for rescuing me from that phase.
Now I am here and I am stronger than ever
Leaving you again is an absolute never,
For how can I allow for the darkness to reoccur
How much more of it can I endure.
Without you wounds and daggers were all around
A ray of sunshine was not to be found,
That place was like a dry land waiting for a tear of rain
But the clouds were completely drained.
I came back ashamed not knowing what to say
But still you asked me to stay,
Before you I was blinded and could not see
I was drowning in my own materialistic sea.
You opened my eyes to feel your love
With you around me nothing is tough,
Everything is gorgeous and full of beauty
Serving you is the most glorious duty.
That great happiness returned to me as soon as I arrived
Your holiness became essential for me to survive,
The world no longer revolved around me
But rather around the world which bows to thee.